Dare to be a Man

EXT. SUBURBAN BACK YARD – DAY

A man, ALEX (32, stubbly, out of shape) stands heroically, as he stares out into the distance, a steely gaze on his face. Beside him stands him girlfriend, FIONA (30, pixie like) who looks up at him concerned. The sun shines over the house behind them in a blue sky.

FIONA
You don’t have to do this you know.

ALEX
Yes I do. You don’t understand.

FIONA
You’re right I don’t, I really don’t. What is it with you guys and bets?

Alex looks down at Fiona intensely.

ALEX
If we accept the bet we have to do it.

FIONA
No you don’t.

ALEX
Yes we do, it’s in the code.

FIONA
What code?

ALEX
The man code.

FIONA
C’mon, really, the man code?

ALEX
Yes.

FIONA
But this is stupid, like really stupid.

Alex looks up to the distance again, back to hero pose.

ALEX
This isn’t about stupidity, this is about honour. If a man accepts a bet then he is honour bound to complete it. If he does not, then he is no longer a man. This is the law of the man code.

FIONA
You’re making it sound all noble but this is just you literally jumping into a bath tub full of lard.

Pan out to reveal that Alex, dressed only in speedos, and Fiona, stand in front of a bath tub full of lard. Around them stand many of ALEX’S MATES ready to cheer him on, most at least a little tipsy, with empty cans of lard scattered around the lawn.

ALEX
What the dare involves is not important. What’s important is completing the dare. That’s what I’m going to do. That’s why I’m a man.

FIONA
Right, but you do agree it is stupid.

ALEX
(still looking heroic)
Yes.
(yelling widely)
Alright here we go!

ALEX’S MATES
Five! Four! Three! Two! One!

Fiona runs away as Alex jumps high in to the air to splat back down into the tub full of lard. All the men cheer and raise there drinks as he resurfaces.

ALEX
Oh my God! It’s even more disgusting than it looks, it’s even more disgusting than it looks. It’s everywhere, it’s creeped into every part of my body.

FIONA
I don’t understand you!

ALEX
I’m a man! I’m a man!

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