Presto Pest-Go – Scene 2

This scene is part of a pilot episode for a sitcom that I wrote as part of my Masters. See past days to catch up on the rest of the episode.

INT. PRABIR AND STEVE’S APARTMENT, LOUNGE ROOM – DAY

Prabir enters from the bathroom at the same time his room mate, JAKE (20, fit, douchebag) dressed in shorts and a frilly pink apron, enters from the kitchen. He smiles wide and clearly hides something behind his back.

JAKE
Prabs, slow down, man. You’re looking lovely.

PRABIR
Jake! You’re up early! I’m afraid I don’t have time to talk. Wait, you really like my suit?

JAKE
Nah, mate, it’s shit. I got home about an hour ago, which gave me enough time to make a little gift to help you relax on your first day.

Jake brings his hands from behind his back to reveal he’s holding a cupcake, giggling as he does so.

PRABIR
I want to say that’s very kind of you but I have a feeling it isn’t.

JAKE
How dare you! How could you say that to me?

PRABIR
It’s just that in the month I’ve been living here you haven’t cooked a single thing. Now you’ve baked a single cupcake, not a dozen. That’s odd, people don’t do that. And you can’t seem to stop giggling. (Beat).
You roofied my cup cake didn’t you?

JAKE
I roofied your cup cake!

Jake starts laughing uncontrollably at his own joke.

PRABIR
I asked you kindly to stop roofieing my food! Why do you even have roof – No, I don’t want to – I have to go.

JAKE
Here, take it.

PRABIR
I don’t want to.

JAKE
Take it.

PRABIR
I’m going to be late!

JAKE
So you should just take it.

PRABIR
I don’t want a cupcake that I know is roofied!

JAKE
Well you’re not going to want your lunch then.

Prabir looks towards his lunch in shock, then turns back angrily.

PRABIR
Is there anything in this house you haven’t roofied!

Prabir walks into the kitchen and looks down at a tray of food on the bench.

PRABIR (CONT’D)
What are these?

JAKE
Well those are my mini quiches, I whipped them up for myself while I was waiting for your cupcake to cook.

PRABIR
Right, well, I’m confiscating some of these!

Prabir starts snatching quiches off the tray, throwing them into his briefcase.

JAKE
Hey, c’mon now, that’s out of line, you don’t steal your roommates food!

PRABIR
Are you kidding me!

Prabir storms towards the front door then slows and stops turning around to look at Jake suspiciously.

PRABIR (CONT’D)
Eat one.

JAKE
What?

PRABIR
Eat a miniature quiche.

JAKE
We just call them mini quiches.

PRABIR
Put a miniature quiche in your mouth right now.

JAKE
(shrugs)
Gladly.

Jake takes a bite of a quiche, chews, swallows and then opens his empty mouth to Prabir.

JAKE (CONT’D)
Delicious.

PRABIR
Thank you, although now I’m late for my first day of work, so I hope your happy.

JAKE
Have a good day sweetie!

Prabir quickly leaves the house.

JAKE (CONT’D)
And I’m very happy.

20Jake falls back, unconscious, a smile on his face.

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